6 days till we leave and new pictures

We have less then a week till we leave and I cannot even describe how happy, nervous, excited we are. We have been given an unexpected blessing of 4 new pictures of Katie today!! What a way to start the day.

We have had such a busy week. We have had a revival at our church this week with a wonderful couple encouraging us, singing wonderful music and praying for us. Pastor Dale Freed spoke to us about the story of when the disciples were in the boat and Jesus had left to pray. I know many of you reading this have heard and read the story numerous times, but when I heard it this time I could relate to it in a different way. The bible tells us that Jesus didn't return until the 4th watch, which is between 3 and 6 a.m. , so this tells us they waited, a long time. The waters were rough, it was windy, dark, and probably cold. They probably had wondered where is Jesus, He has left us out here all night in this awful weather, but then He appeared walking on the water, and they were afraid, they thought they had seen a ghost. Then Jesus asked Peter to walk on the water and he did, but when he saw the wind, he was distracted and started to sink, Jesus took his hand and said "you of little faith, why did you doubt?" You see in our adoption journey we have had so much rough water, but Jesus has said to us, come walk on the water with me, keep your eyes on me. At times we have felt we were in a hurricane. It has been difficult to say the least, but we have kept our eyes on Jesus and know as long as we keep our eyes on Him and follow His leading all things will work together for good. No where in the bible does it say it will be an easy road. We have cried many tears, however have felt Jesus holding us. For those of you still waiting for referral, PA, RA or TA, know that Gods timing is always perfect.

CONFIRMED TRAVEL DATES

Its been a whirlwind of a day, a week for that matter. Today K emailed to confirm our CA and travel dates. We will depart on 11-6 and return 11-21. On top of making flight reservations we had to deal with the seating chart. We first saw when we tried to do our online seat assignments that the long leg of our trip, a mere 13 hours and 20 min there were no 3 or even 2 seats together. We cannot have a 7 yo sitting by herself. I called NW and they very happily gave us 3 seats together!! So on both of the long flights we have 3 seats together, and on the 2 & 4 hours flights both ways only 2 seats are together. We are hoping once on board there may be availability or maybe someone will exchange seats, which they gladly may when they see they get to sit by a 7 yo and a 12 month old:) It is bittersweet joy as we wish our boys were coming with us. I am already missing them so much. It was our hope that our youngest 2 boys would be coming. However they feel that they cannot miss 12 days of school in high school. Our oldest 2 boys are in college and cannot miss. I do think they are a bit excited with having the house with no parents though. Between family, neighbors, and people from our church I know they'll be well watched over and loved.

TA!!!!!!!!

Yes, it came!!! I have to recap todays events for you. You may want to read my post from yesterday to fully understand what I'm talking about now. I had emailed our travel coord and asked for a phone call at work to discuss whats going on. I left work early today and no phone call. I of course checked my email when I came home to find an email from K letting me know that they will call as soon as our TA arrives. That it could be another 3 weeks. I had no words really. Many emotions, and anger was at the top. As I left to take our visa apps to the fed ex box I walked down the driveway crunching the leaves on the driveway that had fallen. I love the beautiful colors of the leaves and the way they crunch when you walk on them. I once again talked to God telling Him that as angry and sad as I was I would praise Him. I praised Him for the wonderful colors and also that I am able to walk to hear that crunch when I walk . I am thankful for my vision to see those beautiful leaves. We all have so much to be thankful for.I have so much to be thankful for I told Him. I asked Him to take the anger away and replace those feelings with love. And you know what, He did. I went to the fed ex box, picked up Brooke from school and decided to stop for pop and pizza for the kids for dinner. I just wasn't in the mood for cooking. I had a peaceful feeling that only God can give. And then what happened? I was walking into the pizza store when my cell phone rings and its Jeff to say, "we got it", very calmly I might add. "Got what" I said, "you know, our TA", he says. Aghhhhh!! Are you kidding me? This adoption journey is so full of emotions, but as I mentioned before, it takes alot of faith. And sometimes faith isn't easy, especially when you are in the middle of a very emotional event.

I have many AWAA friends who are still waiting for the LOA. There are no words for what they are going through. It has been almost 4 weeks since the last LOA's came. Please uplift them in prayer. Pray for renewed strength that can only be given by God.

One more thing, our "tentative" travel dates are 11-6-11-21. We will not know for sure until we have our CA(consulate appt). We are hoping that comes very soon, but we KNOW God is in control and ALL things work together for good to them that love God who are called according to His purpose.

11 months and and no TA

It is Sunday afternoon as I write this. On Friday all of my rumor queen buddies within in the U.S. with the same RA date as us received their TA. Everyone but us. Our agency never called. I waited and waited. Everytime the phone rang I knew it had to be them but it never was. Around 2 o'clock Jeff asked me to call the agency to find out if they had come or not. I asked the gentleman who answered the phone and he replied "thats a good question, let me get K for you." I ended up leaving a voicemail however never heard back.

I'm so happy for all of the RQ friends, I truly am. Its funny how you can be so happy for someone and yet so sad for yourself. They are all so excited. Some are making flight plans and packing to leave as soon as this week!! Maybe DHL misplaced our agencies package and it will arrive on Monday I first told myself. Then I have heard that Consulate Appts. are becoming limited due to the sn and nsn TA arriving. Some agencies have already told their families they may not travel until the end of November. So where does that leave us? I have no idea.

Today Katie is 11 months old. Yet another month older and the time for us to get TA & CA appt is getting less and less to be with her for her 1st birthday. The airfare is getting much higher as we approach the holidays. Too many questions and no answers.

Everyday while I was waiting for our LOA I would get up in the morning hoping and praying it would come that day. I would tell God I will praise you all day, and if it comes I will praise you, but aha, the hard part , if it DOESN'T come I WILL praise you. And I did. Friday, when the TA'S starting coming in I said this, and I meant it. I am still praising Him for all He has done and will do. That doesn't mean I'm not sad. The weekend has been probably the hardest times in this process, with the exception of finding out about the tainted formula.

As I close this post I will refer to one of my favorite bible verses,"For all things work together for good to them that love God, who are called according to His purpose." I know that all of these things will work out for the good. Thats not to say that it is not hard. The last time I had said in a post I hope to have good news soon, I did. So I will once again say that hopefully the next time I post all things will have worked out. In the meantime, please lift our family in prayer through this very difficult time.

New picture

This picture was taken 3 weeks ago. She is just under 15 lbs here. I have been holding out on a new post praying and hoping to get our TA(travel approval) with news of confirmed dates we would be leaving. Unfortunately this has not happened. Our agency had said we may be able to leave 10/30 if we received our TA by 10/17, so we have 1 more day, however I am doubtful it will come. I am hopeful it will come next week and our agency can then ask for our CA(Consulate appt.) Once we have this we can then book our flights. It looks like we will probably leave 11/13. If we leave any later then this we will not be with Katie for her 1st birthday, but we are not even going to think that.

Katie update & some thoughts

We received our update on Katie. I'm not too sure what to think to be honest. They say she is healthy, praise God for that!! However they also said she has never had the tainted formula, which of course would be great, but thats not what her referral papers say. They said she is drinking Nestle formula, which we know is a safe formula. She has no teeth yet and is starting to crawl. In her pictures she is sitting alone, but she does not look very stable, but she is sitting alone:)

This journey has been full of ups and downs. Sometimes we have seen things that don't make sense or are unfair. I have had the privilege to be on my knees for our brothers and sisters in Christ and their children. I have cried many tears for people I don't know, but only through our agency and our special need family list. I've witnessed a miracle through a little girl who was left to die in a dirty hospital half way around the world, and through the power of prayer she has come home, had extensive heart surgery and is doing exceedingly well. I've seen families paperwork for the approval process come quickly, while others wait and cry out to the Lord, why must they wait?

In a short time we will be in China, to bring home our baby that the Lord perfectly chose to be a Walker. We started this journey not sure of what age to ask for. We were feeling too old for a baby, and had questions about preschool age. We struggled alot with this, when one day Jeff said we need to ask 0-5 and leave it to the Lord. However old she is, God has full control. We truly expected to be called from our agency for a 4 year old, partly because our agency told us the wait would probably be shorter as we were open to an older age then most. Then one day we learned of a little girl age 7, only a few months older then Brooke. We reviewed a partial file and prayed and felt this may be our daughter. I was very excited at the thought of virtual twins, and of course in my head I was already making plans! When we received her complete file and had 2 Dr.'s review it we knew without any doubt we could not proceed with her adoption. We had great peace about this. Some months later we found out she is being adopted and am so greatful to hear that wonderful news. The day we received our phone call about our then 7 month old daughter was a day of many emotions. When I first saw her pictures I had many tears of joy flowing down my face. Of which I received many hugs from the kids as we sat around the computer. I was in shock, ok we both were at how young she was. A friend of mine said to me when I told her how old Katie was that God had a sense of humor. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was our child, picked by God as we surrended Him full control. All I could do was look around my house and see how unbabyproof it is. haha We travel next month and its still unbabyproof, but that will change, very soon!! When we found out about the tainted formula, I can't begin to describe how I felt. I was unable to work for 2 days, praying almost without ceasing for our baby to be ok. She appears to be ok, however will have some tests to go through after coming home to check her kidney levels and check for bladder & kidney stones.

For those who haven't personally gone through the adoption process you have no idea what we waiting parents go through. Adoption is an act of faith. When we found out how young our Katie was, one of my first prayers to God was, ok God, I was obediant in giving you full control over the age of her, now please God, let me be with her for her first birthday. God has answered my prayer. We may only be with her for 1 day before her birthday, but we WILL be with her. It has been so much fun baby shopping. Things have changed alot since 7 years ago. Its different when you are babyshower shopping and you're following someones registry, its almost like a mission. But here we are now babyshopping for us. I think I forgot how many things babies need. haha I have been having so much fun doing this.

Well, this post is probably far too long, but thats what happens when I post in the middle of the night:)